I completely agree, communication is a two way street and how something is received is not always the same as how it is intended. This forum is no different. While no harm was intended and I was surprised to see you took offense, I am not denying your feelings of being offended by my not-even-very-funny-attempt-at-a-joke and immediately apologized it didn’t come across as intended.
What I want to emphasise is that at no point I judged you as a person for making a typo, made fun or light of a visual impairment, or claim to be superior, or claim I never make typos. Those are your words, not mine, and I do not stand by such an interpretation. I care deeply about inclusivity and making people feel welcome and appreciated for the things they do.
As far as I’m concerned, typos are not a character trait, (lack of) skill, or malintent; they’re just a thing that happens to everyone. Making a typo says nothing about a person. People are not defined by fingers slipping on the keyboard, autocorrect, or not speaking English natively, so at no point did I consider a comment about a typo could be taken as such a grievous personal insult to be considered toxic behavior. Clearly my judgement on that part was wrong, a mistake I’ll own, apologised for, and will try to avoid in the future.
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If you’re going to double-down on calling me condescending and disrespectful though, allow me to hold up a mirror to your own behavior and words:
How else but in a condescending way, and as a personal insult even, can that be interpreted?
In code reviewing or other situations where people may feel personally invested in something that’s being reviewed or discussed, one of the most important things I always try to do is focus on the code or result and not the person. The “thing” is being reviewed - not who made it. I firmly believe a person is not dumb or malicious if they make a mistake or have a different opinion, nor do I believe that makes me better than anyone else. I do stupid shit all the time.
In this case I did the same - I commented on the typo, not the person that made the typo. As a result you decided to retaliate with an attack a personal level (toxic behavior, childish), showing the exact behavior you then accuse me of (condescending, disrespectful). I can empathise and forgive lashing out in a moment of feeling disrespected or offended, but by doubling down a day later, something with a pot and a kettle comes to mind.
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Yes, I do actually think that being able of teasing and joking around a little is a good thing for the community. We should be able to have a laugh together and not always be only business or Q&A.
We’re all human, each with our own personality, things we may (or may not) find funny or interesting, and I do think we should be able to share those things alongside developing knowledge of the framework. I’d consider that part of the soft skills you bring up. I think the participation and bonds that form when we act like humans with personalities and faults will be deeper if we share those things, too.
That does of course require mutual respect and keeping each other accountable. There are limits and lines that should not be crossed, which may not always be clear to all parties. You’ve held me accountable for my words being offensive, which I would encourage everyone to do if my words or actions cause harm. I know I can be outspoken at times and because of the various hats I wear in the community and open source project my words do carry some weight. By calling me out, you’ve given me the opportunity to reflect on the way I communicate with people and that not everyone will appreciate the same things.
I can’t undo offending you, but I can try to do better/be more mindful in the future, which I will. I hope you will too.
I’ve also edited my earlier apology to use “came across” instead of “regarded” as the latter may not have been the right word to use due to a subtly different meaning.